Open Mic: The Consumer

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   just a quick'un 
 
 
 
The cold at the back of my heart is slowly consuming
Toying with destroying it, physically abusing
The liver will freeze, my lungs become musky
The lock is still fresh but the keys become rusty
Heartburn sparked out, let the soul reignite us
The bad blood in my veins is just hepatitus
I kill queers for the sake of evangelicals
I shoot steers and paternal cowboys that refuse to cut the umbillical
I've killed fake rappers, hypocrites, bear trappers, inuits
I've killed dicks with emo fringes, I've killed kids that think they killing it
Or illing it, I don't give a shit cos at the end I stay cold
I kill people that deserve a life, hoping mine will take hold
Fuck it, I'm Metaxas' son, I withered and I dropped
But I never ever gave up and I never fucking stopped
Alors, c'est la guerre I tell em, it's not my native tongue
I'm the tortoise you're the hare, and this damage has been done
I am just a what and I'm searching for a why
Away from girls that like to look like crumpled neon signs
Trying to find a reason before I fill with mould and expire
Looking for the kick to push my stomach 2 inches higher

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stuckinthepost Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 14 April 2010 Location: Gravesend Status: Offline Points: 634 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-7-1 Form: WLLWLN	Post Options Post Reply Quote stuckinthepost Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Topic: The Consumer Posted: 05 September 2010 at 8:52pm
	just a quick'un The cold at the back of my heart is slowly consuming Toying with destroying it, physically abusing The liver will freeze, my lungs become musky The lock is still fresh but the keys become rusty Heartburn sparked out, let the soul reignite us The bad blood in my veins is just hepatitus I kill queers for the sake of evangelicals I shoot steers and paternal cowboys that refuse to cut the umbillical I've killed fake rappers, hypocrites, bear trappers, inuits I've killed dicks with emo fringes, I've killed kids that think they killing it Or illing it, I don't give a shit cos at the end I stay cold I kill people that deserve a life, hoping mine will take hold Fuck it, I'm Metaxas' son, I withered and I dropped But I never ever gave up and I never fucking stopped Alors, c'est la guerre I tell em, it's not my native tongue I'm the tortoise you're the hare, and this damage has been done I am just a what and I'm searching for a why Away from girls that like to look like crumpled neon signs Trying to find a reason before I fill with mould and expire Looking for the kick to push my stomach 2 inches higher
	you come at the king, you best not miss.

Kiki Spirez Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Superior Member Joined: 30 December 2008 Location: Chesterfield Status: Offline Points: 4375 Crew: Kratos Kind Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 68-26-0 Form: WWWWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Kiki Spirez Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 05 September 2010 at 9:01pm
	The liver will freeze, my lungs become musky The lock is still fresh but the keys become rusty For some reason, i loved the wording and imagery in this bar. Overall very nice for a quick piece dude, you're still onwards and upwards in your elevating, it's great to see. Keep up.


stuckinthepost Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 14 April 2010 Location: Gravesend Status: Offline Points: 634 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-7-1 Form: WLLWLN	Post Options Post Reply Quote stuckinthepost Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 05 September 2010 at 9:18pm
	Thanks Kiki
	you come at the king, you best not miss.

J504 Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Banned Joined: 08 June 2010 Status: Offline Points: 5385 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 25-0-0 Form: WWWWWW	Post Options Post Reply Quote J504 Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 06 September 2010 at 4:36am
	can somebody say "slept on"? Good shit, dude. You really have a advanced concept of writing for your age and your battle style is coming up too, trust, I've noticed. You'll be a fucking beast one day!

$n00z Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 06 February 2010 Location: NC Status: Offline Points: 1267 Crew: The Dynasty Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 11-7-0 Form: WWLWWL	Post Options Post Reply Quote $n00z Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 06 September 2010 at 8:36am
	like it. was it jus a quick key?? the killing it part was a tid bit stretched but other than that solid drop
	U already know...

stuckinthepost Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 14 April 2010 Location: Gravesend Status: Offline Points: 634 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-7-1 Form: WLLWLN	Post Options Post Reply Quote stuckinthepost Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 06 September 2010 at 3:59pm
	yeahh it took about 15 mins tops. I get what you mean but the killing bit was spposed to be stretched. hence 'kill kids who think they killing it' and stuff
	you come at the king, you best not miss.

Cuba Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Moderator Legendary Assassin Joined: 14 June 2004 Location: England Status: Offline Points: 12332 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 47-22-0 Form: WWWWLW	Post Options Post Reply Quote Cuba Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 06 September 2010 at 8:27pm
	I don't know how old you are so I can't really comment on 'for your age', but I thought this was nice...couple of instances where the rhythm seemed a little stretched, but I like your concepts, really liked some of them actually...and the way you put your verses together is sharp, especially with some of your references (that even I have to look up) They had a phrase for this back in the day: Straight Knowledgin'


stuckinthepost Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Standard Member Joined: 14 April 2010 Location: Gravesend Status: Offline Points: 634 Text Rank: Unranked Stats: 6-7-1 Form: WLLWLN	Post Options Post Reply Quote stuckinthepost Report Post Likes(0) Quote Reply Posted: 06 September 2010 at 8:34pm
	Thanks very much man, means a lot actually. I just turned 16 btw
	you come at the king, you best not miss.