Open Mic: functional addict

What i post is lyrics that portray my reality
Im going through it latley lifes been challenging me
im loossin view of the big picture
my goals are blending in with the mixture
and everything has turned grey
i woke up today and everything looked the same
absent of anger or pain , i think ive lost my way
Things continue on the same i fiend for a change
Bet at first glance i dont look like a functional addict
Your lookin at managment
that can manage bad habits
Big reaponsibilty with more to match it.
i cant play the roll of two different ppl forever
only so long can i keep it together. before it all falls apart and starts to crumble
my future buried in the rubble
changes in my face so suttle
eventually someone is bound to wonder
Whats wrong with me one day someone is bound to see
Im twistin the pipe. blowin out them dragon clouds
when no one is around
But everything that goes up
must come down
my positiion and my occupation
is the only thing that keeps me validated
The only place that i belong
what am i gunna do when it all goes wrong
Im trying to be strong im trying to hold on
Im trying to live.but im internally sick
the devils dick gettin me lite but draining me of my soul
with every hit
and i think im going down with it
if my mom were here shed be livid
These are my thoughts needin ventin
so i had to spit it