LA Magazine: -- WWC Mag. Volume 7 --

 

. . . and here we are again.

Another week down in the books. It’s hard to believe but we are already into week 9. Over two months of the weekly writing challenge, and I’d be damned if It hasn’t produced some epic verses.

At this point, we are all starting to see familiar faces each week. Some has solidified themselves as front runners in the challenge, some still striving to hit the mark and finally get their name branded into the ever so illustrious winners circle. No matter what, just keep in mind that these weekly challenges are meant to be nothing more than a short exercise is honing your craft and becoming a better writer. Keep pushing and I promise your day to shine will come.

Per usual, thank you so much to everyone who participates and shows support. A special thanks to the ones who have stuck with the challenge from the beginning. Thank you for giving us your continued effort week in and week out.

This week’s topic I gave you the image of a woman who dawns black, almost dead like eyes with cracks appearing on the surface of her skin. Although a simple image, I feel like there was many avenues to take, and multiple conclusions and stories you could give to this woman. Let’s see what we actually got.  

 CHAIN

 First writer up is CHAIN. Not too often we get someone posting their verse quicker than Neek haha!

 CHAIN started off with a very clean intro. . .

“The tension was thick, it made my capillaries twitch
But my aura is a knife and a Capoeira kick.”

I feel this is the most important bar of the verse as it not only sets the tone and the pace, it will be the one factor that hooks the reader and captures their immediate attention to the verse. CHAIN is really good at bringing the readers in early and holding their attention span

How I walked in the room as cold as January mist
They at a loss for words, their vocabularies dipped.
I'm bagging every brick packing Tackleberry fifths
'Cause Ed, Edd and Eddy sniff that Aguilera, Kris.
All his Friends were white on some Matthew Perry shit
Reminiscing on the past like how 'member berries spit.
I'm checking for the asps and the timbre of their hiss
I listen like the walls, to their crescendo and their pitch.”

 So let’s also mention, that once CHAIN gets you on the hook, he keeps you on the hook. Because the execution of his wording and metas. CHAIN has a really unique approach to his play on words. It’s always a joy to see his style on display.

 “As they slither and adjust the tempo of their mix
I hear it through the filters how they engineered their flip...
Of the sample of the truth they looped into a lie
But super on the low like when looting's racialized.
They wanna crucify me, they got snitches on their team
Do your guy like Pablo for that chick from Medellín”

 And the verse makes such an excellent landing. . top notch stuff if you ask me.

 Daydizzle89

 Next up is the homie Dizzle.

“Hiding behind cracked foundations you paved in
Black eyes withs a subtle smile while calling everyone a racist
Chain, links broken hundreds of years before on the slave ships”

 Going right it, we can tell it’s a diss to CHAIN. Now some may say, “does he have to do this, it’s a topical challenge” . . but I say, this is a platform for people to do with as they wish! Now, moving forward. . here is the million dollar question. Did Daydizzle successfully incorporate the image into the diss? Lets dig in further and find out. .

"Your quick to paint it and place him off this basis
Fact is, Im just not complacent with your gay shit
Oh shit, homo slander here Chain, go run to a safe place (bitch)
you have it set in stone that im a racist who supports rapists"

 my guess is that you are referring to Kavanaugh in the supports “racist” line. And most liberals will label anyone a racist that supports trump. . or lacks support for ANTIFA or BLM . .so I feel where your coming from bro. I unfortunately have to take those same criticisms because I support a lot of Trumps policies, and disagree with just about every policy on the left.

“Face it kid, its easy to spread hate when you think your the greatest
LA, your famous for two things, writing dank shit then erasing it
complaining, i need that Hailee bit deleted but you couldnt replace it
And when you take shots at daydizz, make sure you mention his name (bitch)
All those vague hits with indirect displays miss
Face it kid, im the train on the tracks and i got you raging
You cant fake it till you make it when your on nobodies playlist
I shatter dreams and derail kids brains with shell casings
Chain taking shots from Daydizz every single day (just embrace it)”
 

O.K. so, as far as the challenge itself, the only line I could see that really relates to the image is at the very beginning of the verse when you relate CHAIN’s actions to the cracks, and Black eyes. I also get that the internal relationship is that you are comparing CHAIN to a female, but it’s a reach since only a couple lines seem to correlate that connection. So, I have to say Diz, you failed in execution. . however, I don’t think that mattered much to you as this was really just an opportunity to get at CHAIN. Again lol. . .

Crimson Juice

“A mask i use to hide my parodys of pain is now showing cracks,
An item i confined in,loosin' clarity like a wax LP that's scratched,
Serves as my portal to the outside world im cacooned by a guise,
Helps me feel mortal now im immuned from eyes that scrutinise,”

I really enjoy that Crim always comes from a deep centered topic. Maybe the flow is not as refined, or wavy as some others . . but he makes up for it with sheer layers and emotion. I have noticed some grammatical errors in the underlined words, not a big deal, but when they are back to back like that, they can be noticeable.

 “It cares and protects me it shields me from insults & harms way,
& dare i say it's effects ppl,as being concealed for me is headway,
Its my bastion as at first glance it deceives from different views,
Like a fashion object its then perceived & turns heads like screws,
It cloaks the predicament of my disfigurement & it acts as armour,
Didn't repent flames left me this tinged scent I'm now no charmer,
Its said eyes are the windows to souls mine are as black as coal,
I'm feelin' as hollow as a hole my charred face lacks the control,”

I feel bad for the character here. She basically has to wear a mask to hide her inner turmoil and pain. At the same time, it almost seems like this façade is so noticeable that It actually affects the perception of the people around her and the relationship between her and others. That’s a high cost to the proverbial hiding in fear as we know it.

“On its own to project any confidence or to stamp my dominance,
Luckily i live in opulence my mask & face a pair like condiments,
Well travelled & world renowned i scare people & some i astound,
I'm top bill in a freak show when in town shackled to a fairground,”

So disjointed and reclusive, she has succumbed and accepted her freakish like nature to the world. There is so much here to like, but perhaps one area to touch on would be the multis. Keep those same internal rhymes and maybe in throw in a few more, and try to end each line with a multi 2 or 3 syllable scheme and I think the flow would pop off the page and make your writtens much more memorable.

Neek

 The big homie Neek. Usually Neek drops a verse like  . .the first hour the challenge gets posted lol . . so he was a little late to the squared circle with this one. Lets see what he gave us.

“false bravado, my role model a small Geppetto”

Right off the bat I had to go Google Geppetto lol . .  after now knowing it was Pinocchio’s inventor, the concept of this line landed much harder to me.

“I dance on a bed of lies;
cheeks rosey from the walts I peddle
my faults have settled, but I, don't acknowledge…
its all a shitshow
bring new definition to "unauthorized",
I want my wall with medals
inside the hollow echo's these empty hello's”

 Seems like this character really seeks accolades and success. Very obsessive as if boundaries to achieve such goals do not exist. .

 “but you dont hear me tho..and if ya'll would let go..
I wouldnt have to picture myself a Hikaru Genji, fellow
as I daydream on my dingy pillows
I pack one helluva bite like a great white
but my teeth are tinted yellow..”

 hmmm. . interesting, we are ¾’s of the way in and im still wondering what this is all leading up too. .

“my name is Smoothtung, this is the mask I wear…
eyes black as the heroin sack I pack to share
metaphorically "im partially cracked", a sad affair.”

 Lmao. . okayyyyy. . . sooooo. . . we get two disses in one weekly challenge. . ANOTHER WWC FIRST!!!

O.K., unlike Dizzles verse, I feel this one drew a bit more from the topical image and this would serve as a better example on how to execute a topical route such as this. Basically, tung hiding behind a mask of lies, and thus, the image relates to a female which = bitch.  . basically exactly where Dizz’s aim was vs. CHAIN. However, as a personal preference, I like that it started out almost poetic and obscure then built up to the ultimate punch-line. I’m almost starting to feel bad for Tung at this point, but hey. . . he did it to himself.

 iLL Scripturez

 “A pressure so intense has her Brittany in ‘07
Fed her lines for her nose differently than Kevin”

I noticed that iLL has been very wordplay heavy in several of his recent drops, and this is no exception. He commands the reader’s attention, and writes with a nice air of authority. There is a lot that can be learned by reading verses from the likes of iLL Scripturez.

“Under this umbrella where chivalry is deaded
Worth’s not the wiser when dignity is questioned
It’s the media connected to the viewer who will listen
Believing lies from users that Wikipedia can edit
Here’s to the highest bidder but I’m fiscally indebted
Vividly defensive as they’re scribbling offenses
Painted as a visionary but imagery’s neglected”

And let’s take a moment to notice how smooth this is. The devil is in the details, and he goes the fuck in with those multis and attention to detail. I say this a lot to describe these types of verses. . but its so fitting. . “the read is effortless”

“Even acknowledging a loss makes sympathy subjected
Cracking every minute with where this industry is headed
Face value is meaningless when its visibly rejected
Wear a mask to adapt to the bigotry projected
It’s not the real her, it’s the she that’s protected”

 So if I have this right, I believe this is the story of woman who has to wear a mask to hide the negative critique and exposure she receives from fame. . like when Brittany’s very public life and pressure within caused her to go bat shit crazy. . .  if my interpretation if off here, please feel free to correct me in the comments. One of my favorite verses of the week for sure.

Sammy

 Always a pleasure to have Sammy grace us with a verse. I always look forward to his unorthodox delivery, and to see which angle he takes. Going right into the verse, he hits us with some incredible imagery as only Sammy can do it. .

 “She was a pillar to most. Born of the shittiest home.
A village in Rome where pillaging’s considered the norm.
Drifting along the dusty delta humming “this is your song”
“Do i belong?” Her visage, long nose, overgrown jawline
  
running on God’s time. Mother Teresa occupied her wall shrine.
All by herself.
Fine china neatly placed inside stained oak finish
She notices it. Cracks. Mildews and molds. Gross inset
Growth. Malignant juxtapose personal hinderance.”

 Whoa whoa whoa. . slow down all that crazy assonance and poetics man lol . . Malignant juxtapose personal hindrance??? Who thinks of this shit? Sammy does. . that’s who!   

“14 years old surrogate to 4 little siblings.
God and Goulding holding her. Image.”

Whaaaaat!

“Maybe if i suck in my cheeks?”
Perhaps a new hairstyle to keep it discreet?
“I’m a china doll!” All the while lines emerges under widow’s peak.
fine china coming apart at the seam
But these second hand charity made it warm, at the least.”
 

So my take away was this is about vanity and staying young. Told in the most poetically fractured of ways. . . this was a dope entry here sir. Well played.

 Rhetorical

 So, ill be forthcoming. I really didn’t quite get this verse off the way I wanted to. I had the concept in my head. A wife that turned materialistic with her rich snobby friends. I wanted to illustrate her growing materialistic and trendy like a department store mannequin in a mall, but also growing more and more distant. I tried, but 16 lines just didn’t give me enough to develop all that. so I went a bit more straight forward “marriage drifting apart” kind of verse.

 

 I should have kept that line for a bigger and better verse tbh lol. .

“mixed feelings, can’t believe the position were in
me scraping the start, you’re always tasting the end
tears vape into nothing, constant shaking within
arteries burst, seems your hearts breaking again
closed wall in the doors, you never let me inside
gave me glimpses of you in the corner of eyes”
 

in hindsight, that last line was maybe worded a little awkwardly. This is also the point where I think the original concept eluded my grasp.

 “your touch is foreign to me, it mordantly hides
you lie accordingly, love unfortunately died
wasting air from my lungs resuscitating our lives
complicating each other ‘til one of us cries
never understood us, but none was the wise
you just stood there, silent, ghost of a mime
wish I could pry your skull open exposing your mind
but its hopeless, I know its transposing the lines
you’re my mannequin wife, still, almost frozen in time
 
so I’ll wait.”

So yea, overall. . . im actually pleased with the technical aspects of the verse. I was a bit rushed to write this and next one I will try to make more time to develop it more. . . don’t really know what more I can say, its awkward trying to break down your own work lol 

Dntplywelwitothers

This was our late entry this week. Glad ya snuck it in before the deadline. Let’s see what were working with here. . .

“Perfection. The only addiction I hunger.
A woman's worth, is determined
On how much you want her...”

 Going right in, this is a very sad truth. Seems a lot of women value themselves based on how much others admire them. Good opener here man. . it pokes at my interest right out the gate

 “Started simple, a nose job, some Botox, a chin lift...
Augmented, in hopes that I could be authentic.
But wait,....I'm not finished!”

o.k. so, personally, the 3^rd line was a bit stale. The lead up was good, and I get the punctuation, it just landed on bland wording. Lets see if you recover.

“Kept enhancing Gods image.
Till the mirror reflected and eerie, odd visage
Now my whole facade's blemished...”

 And yes, you pick the ball back up and start running again, in over drive. This section was deep and very authentic my man.

 “They've ruined my ego, consumed by you people...
A human placebo!
PER-FECT-ION! I told them! "Doctors do your best!"
Now I'm empty, you can see that through my ocular abyss....”

 So yea man, this is probably a sad fate many women and men go through. Pump all that money, agony, and pain into plastic surgery just to physically fuck them up and ultimately turning them ugly inside and out. . I feels It bro

Here are these weeks votes. . . mucho gracias to all who voted!

Neek

CHAIN
Dntplywelwitothers
iLL Scripturez

Crimson Juice

Sammy
CHAIN
Rhetorical

 Sammy

rhetorical
Neek
ill Scripturez

Dntplywelwitothers

iLL Scripturez
Neek
Sammy
 

iLL Scriptures

Sammy
Neek
Rhetorical
 

CHAIN

Sammy
rhetorical
ill ScriptureZ
 

Totals

Sammy 10
rhetorical 7
iLL Scripturez 6
Neek 6
CHAIN 5
Dntplywelwitothers 2

Lets congratulate this week’s Winner. . . the man, the myth, the legend. . .

Sammy

 You earned it young man. You delivered a hell of a fine verse this week and your name is now forever etched into the . . .

Week 1 = Nigma
Week 2 = Rhetorical
Week 3 = Spume Corrupt
Week 4 = iLL Scripturez
Week 5 = Rhetorical
Week 6 = Neek
Week 7 = CHAIN
Week 8 = Sammy

 So you may be saying out loud “hey rhet, what the fucks up with no video deuche”???

Well, unfortunately the votes ran a bit late this week so I had to ditch this week’s video to deliver a magazine by a reasonable time. My work schedule will be pretty hectic for the next few days. I did go more in depth in my break down, so hopefully, that provides a little bit of compensation.

 Also, I will have to push week 10 out a little further as I have some matters to handle on a different site with an event I’m involved in there. So there will be a one week pause, then I will resume WWC on Monday the 22^nd. Unless somebody wants to guest host next week. . in that case, get at me.

Well that about wraps it up LA. Thank you again for all your hard work and efforts. . its truly been a pleasure keeping this challenge moving forward and until next time . . . . . PEACE!

Edited by rhetorical - 09 October 2018 at 7:59pm

Sammy wrote: yes!! i was seriously gunning for it cause of the winner wall. great, job, bro! i'm fully aware of the effort put into stuff like this so props on the content and promptness. salute.

Rhet with another outstanding mag release. This is epic. We need more rhets in our lives. Sammy gratzi on the patzi watzi

Every time you post one of these in like “Sammy who”

You a champ

Firstly a huge thanks for your time here Rhet,i really look forward to these reads
and mags and I've always found yours entertaining,so again,thanks man..i must
say though i've just seen the latest pic,and i'm finding this one a tough angle to
come from..lol.

And congrats Sammy,my alias is going to be on that wall soon too,believe that....